There were some photos I took that just lent themselves to a new Kleinchik Invitational. To those who are new to this contest it started in 2004 with our sabbatical time in Rome. The idea is to make up a funny caption for the photo. Prizes will be awarded in several categories.
The two attached photos are from Torino. The first is from the Palazzo Reale, the royal palace and was one of hundreds of marble statutes. The second was on a street in Torino and we have no idea what it was for.
I have listed the entries in the order I received them without an attribute to who sent it except if it is a winning entry. I have had to explain certain entries, some entries need no explanation and some I have no idea how to explain them.
The following entries can be X-rated. If you are under 18 do not read any further.
ENTRIES FOR STATUTE PHOTO
Myrna (FIRST RESPONSE PRIZE): Hollywood mogul showing off his junk to the young starlet
NOTE: This response was received only 7 minutes after it was posted I think a new record for first responses. Myrna, a Junior High School friend of the Queen will receive her gift in Boston at a Kleinchik Invitational celebration in late July.
Having a ball (not my own)
Don't Tell his Jewish Mother
The Queen (HONORABLE MENTION PRIZE): My parents always said you would go blind if you masturbated .. but hell look my legs fell off.
NOTE: Although most contests state that no relatives are allowed to enter and win prizes the King makes the rules and her entry had us laughing for an hour. This was to get first prize but the Queen said I needed to eliminate her from the competition for prizes.
Is that David holding a rock or his penis?
"Just hangin out and holding on"
Its clearly the men of bachelor in paradise when Chris says...Gentlemen, give me your sexy pose.
By golly I think I have found the solution.
"I am really not comfortable in this position, whose idea was this?"
Don (FIRST PRIZE WINNER STATUE): Hi, my name is Dick and I will be your guide today!
NOTE: Don was one of the first runners the King met a long time ago. His award will be presented at the next Saturday morning "we don't run anymore but we still eat bagels" group in early April.
1) How's he doing? 2) He seems to be holding his own.
Multi-tasking (What else do you do while you are waiting for the sculptor to finish?)
"There's nothing like a good stretch"
But the best part is...
NOTE: I feel an explanation is needed for this entry. Bob and I were camper-waiters a very long long time ago at the crime of the camping world - Camp Kahagon in Pennsylvania. We were young teenagers and the swimming counselor for the camp was bunked in our cabin. Almost every night he would get out a pad and paper and give us sex lessons which included his very descriptive hand drawn pictures of a woman's anatomy. No matter what the picture was of he would end every session with "but you have to remember the best part is the vagina".
Donald Trump imitating Harvey Weinstein imitating a Roman statue.
Ball in hand or hand job
ENTRIES FOR BIRD PHOTO
Bye bye birdie.
Oh shit is that a real bird?
Local wildlife they catch on film, though usually that's the crabs. NOTE: Another Bachelor reference.
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Alan (FIRST PRIZE FOR BIRD): A bird on his back is better then one flying over head
NOTE: Alan, a famous researcher, now lives on the Eastern shore of VA and sees lots of birds so he must know.
The latest in 5-Star art: Dead Bird Soap in a specially lighted shower soap dish. This will save Italy for sure.
NOTE: I want to give a special shout-out to Steve for knowing about our love of Italy and knowing about Italian politics and including it in his response. For those of you who do not know the Stella Cinque (5 Star) party in Italy was started 8 years ago by a comedian in Italy who among other things is anti-Semitic and anti-EU. His party in the recent Italian election got one-third of the vote so certainly will be part of the next government.
Fear of PETA (If you are not sure if the animal is dead or just sleeping.)
"Help I can't get up"
"I'm very comfortable, thank you."